When people learned we've made the decision to put our twins in separate classes at the start of school there's about a 50/50 split: Those who think it's a great idea and those who pause then tell me it's a great idea. I'm guessing that last 50 percent aren't exactly sure why I'd do it.
I mean it is more work for me and I do feel torn at times about who I watch line up or when I'm detained at one classroom trying to get one out whilst the other is looking for me. There are two teachers, two routines and two lots of friends and two lots of settling into school. But I've never regretted this decision we made.
We made this decision even before they were born - I was so relieved to hear they were fraternal twins and even more overjoyed when I noticed how visibly different they were - over time they have developed of course very differently - as they are individuals - they have very different likes/dislikes/temperament and of course learning styles.
We really did want them especially in their first year to have the opportunity to be just themselves. Not 'the twins' as they are often called by new friends or compared which is inevitable when you have twins.
When I did canteen duty the other day I noticed that they play separately, quite happily. They have found their own group of peers and have settled in nicely.
What we have been dealing with last week is a few things:
- Sharing friends - each of the little frills has had a play date this week at our house - they have invited someone home from their respective classes and whilst it was intended to be the same day - due to the one child's schedule we spread it out over two days.
There was initial excitement when we walked home with our new friends - but within the first hour on both dates the twin who was not hosting the playdate was upset because they felt that the playdate had somehow replaced them. 'Laura's not my best friend anymore' and then only two days later the same from Laura's mouth 'Olivia only loves Emma, she doesn't love me anymore'. This will only continue as they get older but I do expect it, and I have explained to them that they can have friends outside the family (they have had for a long time anyways) but it doesn't mean their special relationship has changed. I encouraged them all to play together and that helped that the 'other' twin was reassured.
So I suppose with all the learning done in the classroom there's just that little bit more of a learning curve socially as a twin. And a Mama of twins too.
We're growing up!
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