When my twins were babies I did a stint as a PR Director (volunteer of course) for the Australian Multiple Birth Association. It is a great organisation where you get 'support from those who know' and at my local chapter just being in the company of those with twins and triplets older than mine I had some hope I would have time one day to wash my hair and have more than a 5 second shower and more than 2 hours sleep.
As the PR Director nationally when it came to National Birth Awareness Week I organised a few publicity events - The Today Show, Channel 10 Evening news in Sydney, Kerrie-Ann (yes, me and my family were on Kerrie-Ann) Ready Steady Cook and even 2 sets of quadruplets playing each other on Family Feud...
The families of quads I found were utterly amazing - the parents seemed so calm and proud and their family units were so tight.. but with one family in particular there was a strong sense of pecking order. Although as babies they were all born by caesarian section and within 4 minutes of each other from there was no illusion amongst them all who was the 'eldest' and who was the 'youngest'.
This I found so interesting because the youngest of the four being a girl was termed as 'the baby' and treated that way where the eldest, a boy was the natural leader of the siblings.
It perplexed me. I didn't want one of my girls feeling like they had something over the other one and when I discussed this with hubby we agreed - we wouldn't tell them or people who didn't know (close family and friends who we briefed that we wouldn't tell them). So our girls have always grown up with no real birth order 'older/younger' twin thing in their vocabulary. There's no greater responsibility with being the 'eldest' twin or leniency with the 'youngest' twin. They are equal.
When people ask me in front of them 'Who is the eldest?' I let them answer:
'We're twins, we're born on the same day'.
'But which one of you were born first?'
'Both of us'.
|Love the gappy mouths!|
I truly don't understand the fascination about this with others - my girls say 'Eloise is the big sister and we're the little sisters'. That's enough don't you think?
Of course there's going to be a time they will know - it's on their birth certificates 'older or twins/younger of twins'...
If you have or know twins - do the twins know? Do you think it has a bearing on their relationship with each other or within the family/outside the family?
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